Tuesday, December 3, 2019

Chaotic Thanksgiving Vacation

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Well, I guess, happy super belated Thanksgiving by now. Whoops.

Last week... did not go according to plan.

I had taken the weekend off to visit family for Thanksgiving. It's an annual tradition and I make sure I maintain it. Because of the weekend off, however, I ended up working last Tuesday. I knew this. I had meant to work on my blog post that Monday so I was prepared for my weekly noon update. I was not feeling well though, so I ended up just zoning out Monday night; not remembering my blog until I was ready to go to bed at like 11pm.
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So I didn't have my post set like it should have been. Big surprise there, right? Okay. Not that big of a deal. I would just write it while at work and post it late that day. At least, that was the back-up plan. I forgot that we had our weekly deliveries on Tuesdays, considering I'm almost never there for them. So I spent the morning running around with that and taking care of customers, and Hubby still got off of work at noon, as he does nearly every Tuesday. The morning ended up zipping by. Okay, no problem. I still had the afternoon to write and post, right?

Wellllllllllll....

Black Friday was obviously this past weekend. For any outside the US who might not know what this means, it's the "first day" of the Christmas shopping frenzy. I say "first day" in quotes, because lots of people start their shopping early, and a lot of stores are starting up their "Black Friday" specials earlier and earlier in the month each year. Point is, the term "Black Friday" is a reference to so may people buying that stores' ledgers are always "in the black." It's become a bit of a crazed tradition as people scramble to get most of their Christmas shopping - if not their "big ticket items" - purchased the Friday after Thanksgiving... or... ON Thanksgiving as most stores have started up.

I'm sidetracking myself. Point is that, with our store closed on Thanksgiving itself, I had to make sure the sales tags were scanned, printed, and prepped to be put up late Wednesday so they were good to go when my co-workers opened Friday morning. In order to have enough time to do so, I- I couldn't write Tuesday afternoon because I was busy scanning the store. Whoops again.
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After work then? Nope. It was November, which meant a writing group meeting every Tuesday from 6pm until 8pm. So, right after work I raced to get to my meeting. Didn't even had time to stop for dinner, so Hubby intelligently sent me to work with a frozen meal to heat up and eat while we were doing our first writing sprint. I COULD have used our sprints to work on my blog post, but that wasn't the point. The point was to work on One and the Same, which had been such a fail all month.

Well, there was only four of us at group last week, and one member actually cut out shortly after I got there. Her son sprung it on her that he was actually going to be spending the week out of town to celebrate Thanksgiving with his friends instead, so she wanted to get home to spend some holiday time with him first. Out of the remaining three of us, no one had anything we felt was ready to read to the group, and we didn't have much to discuss about our writing.

I had attempted that the previous week. I waved the white flag and told everyone what was bothering me about OatS; why it's kept me about two years to write as opposed to the one year for Peeping Tomcat. Namely that I had Important Scene A and Important Scene C, but it would be too jarring if they were back-to-back, and I couldn't figure out what Scene B should be to bridge between the two. I gave an example of one of those gaps I needed to bridge over and... well... they tried, but it was less than helpful.

They tried giving me the age-old advice to breaking through writer's block: 1) try killing off a character and see how the others react, and 2) try switching POV. Admittedly, I did attempt the POV switch when working on PT, resulting in the companion story A Plan Forms. I'll get back to this bit advice in a minute. First up, I had to try to explain to the group - in almost painstakingly simple terms - why "just kill off a character" doesn't work for fanfiction unless you're purposely working with an AU, and even so, you have to be careful as to who you kill off and why. It's a tricky thing to do without having your readers kind of rebel against you.

Plus. Ya know. OatS is supposed to be a mostly light-hearted love story? I feel like it would take quite the dramatic turn if I'm suddenly killing off characters. Especially since doing so still wouldn't necessarily help me bridge between the scenes. It would be too large of a tonal shift. And yet, I couldn't just be like "nope. Thanks, but that wouldn't work," because they kept pressing me as to why. "Because it's too much of a tonal shift" didn't seem to be a "valid" answer for them????
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As for the "change POV" thing, part of the problem was I wasn't sure whose POV I needed/wanted to be in, so I was already writing scenes in both Adrien's and Marinette's perspective, and that seemed to be confusing me even further. Their solution? Hand the bridging chapters over to one of the kwamis or another side character.

Huh!?

I stressed to them that my pattern would then be something to the effect of:
  • Marinette chapter
  • Adrien chapter
  • Marinette
  • Adrien
  • Random character, potentially a kwami?
  • Marinette
  • Adrien
  • Marinette
  • Random character again; either the same as before or a random fourth POV
  • Adrien
  • Marinette
  • Adrien
  • Marinette
  • Adrien
  • Random character again; either repeating previous non-Adrienette POV or yet ANOTHER new perspective
  • Marinette
  • Adrien
  • Marinette
  • Adrien
  • Marinette
  • Tag-team between Marinette and Adrien during the climax of the story
And the group was like "Yeah. Why not?"

Why not? They were really cool with having a random third, or fourth, or fifth POV popped in? Seriously?

I wasn't even entirely sure where to begin with explaining why that wouldn't work; why that would potentially be jarring for the readers. But, maybe I'm the one that's in the wrong? Maybe I'm too rigid in my views of how POV should be presented in books?

Or, the more likely take, they figured "it's fanfiction; not something professionally written, so what's the harm?"

Thoughts? If I'm the one who's over-thinking this and if I'm the one who's too rigid in storytelling structure, please let me know in the comments section. If the group was right, I need to hear that.

Anyway, my overall point was that, two weeks ago, when I tried to ask for help on my story, and I couldn't utilize the main tricks other writers - who were working on original stories and had much more free rein - would be able to use, I just... I dunno. I guess I felt frustrated and isolated? Like, after doing this with them for, I think about three years now - maybe four? - they still aren't getting the core differences between fanfiction and original writing. It's almost like going to them for help on a script versus prose. There are things fundamentally different in how one writes one style of fiction over another, and yet I still get advice as if I were writing original content. In fact, I'm also kind of herded towards writing original content, as if my talents are wasted on fanfiction.

It may be true, but still, that's... not what I'm doing right now? So... that's not helping me?

Long and short, while I was still struggling last Tuesday, I didn't feel like my further talking with the remaining members - who happened to also be the ones who understood fanfiction the least out of the group - wouldn't do me much good. So I remained silent, and so did the other two ladies.

We decided to not do the sprints, and instead just utilize the 90 or so minutes the library was still open in order to just have a mini writing retreat.

Maybe THAT was what I needed. I didn't write as fast as I normally do, but I did manage to knock out 1368 words! Granted, about 60 of them is a sort of "note to self: I need these bits figured out and written into the chapter" sidebar, but still, that's over 1300 new words of prose. I'll take that. Better than what I had been doing lately.

I was now up to 3946 words on this attempt for the project. This officially keeps my disastrously pathetic attempt to write about my vampire character back in 2014 as my worst NaNo attempt! Whoo???
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After writing group, I COULD have finally settled in to work on my blog post for Wednesday morning, but at that point I hadn't seen my husband for 12hrs, minus the brief time I spent with him when I picked him up from work before I had to scurry back to mine. I waved the white flag and spent the evening catching up with him and trying to get some chores done.

Wednesday I did try to put in an effort to get this blog post done while I was at work. We couldn't really put up the Black Friday tags until closer to 3pm so that people weren't trying to take advantage of the sales early. However, other work projects came down the pipeline, and since I had taken this week off for a much-needed Staycation, I wanted to make sure those projects were set before I headed out.

I did manage to edit and drop in all the images you have seen - and will see - in this post. Those usually take up the most amount of time anyway. Especially when trying to track down original artists of images I find on Google so I can properly credit them. That takes a lot of time if they've been reposted and re-uploaded over and over and over again online. I also focused on the other semi-time-consuming bit: figuring out that word count for NaNo. I had figured out what I had written last Tuesday, added it to my grand total for the month, and then made sure to dump it here as a reference point to work into my post.

In fact, I did a lot of vague skeleton work for this post on Wednesday: dropping phrases or simple sentences about what I wanted to talk about and in what order. I then spent today working my way up to those bits in order to flesh out the actual post. So... valiant effort on Wednesday? But not nearly enough.

Post-work I was going to work on my post, but I got sidetracked again. I can't recall what sidetracked me though, and I've been trash with my time audits the past month or so. THIS IS WHY I NEED TO REMEMBER TO DO THEM! I'm better at work when I can just have the calendar out on my desk and in my face. I don't really have a place at home where it's readily in my face for whenever I switch up my tasks, and so I forget to go back to it. This is something I need to work on this month so I have a better routine next year.

Anyway. Point is. Clearly my blog post wasn't written Wednesday either.

THURSDAY! Thursday was Thanksgiving, and the unofficial start of my vacation since the store was closed and I had taken Friday off. Hubby had volunteered to work Thanksgiving in order to have the weekend off as well. His store closed at 3pm, so it was too late for us to really join his family for their Thanksgiving dinner. Yes, for those outside the US, on Big Meal holidays such as Thanksgiving, Christmas, or Easter, "dinner" is at like 1pm and lasts for hours before having dessert at like 5pm and then grumbling about being "stuffed" the rest of the evening. Also, since we'd be gone all weekend, and would most likely bring home leftovers from the Thanksgiving dinner on Saturday, we didn't want to put in the effort to make our own Thanksgiving feast. This meant I didn't have to spend the morning and early afternoon slaving away in the kitchen.

This also meant I had until about 2:30pm to just sit and write, if I wanted to. I could finally write my blog post. I could try to squeak in some last-minute word-count for NaNo. I had time.

Instead? Well... First of all, I started the day off with some chores. Okay. I was adulting. That's fine. Good use of my time. Buuuuuut then I watched the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade. It's tradition, but also a bit distracting for me to write at the same time.
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Another distraction was another tradition I had slacked on the entire month. Long-time readers of this blog probably knows what I'm talking about. It's a tradition my mom started when I was a kid, and one I actually forgot about this year until I watched Bob's Burgers on Sunday, November 24th.

In that episode, the eldest Belcher kid Tina had a b-storyline where she tried to include a new Thanksgiving Day tradition that she read about in her Thundergirls - their version of the Girl Scouts of America - handbook.

She called it a Gratitude Tree.
From Bob's Burgers season 10 episode 8 "Now We're Not Cooking With Gas"
You can check out the full clip about Tina's attempt to initiate this new family tradition here:
This hit close to home to me because this is EXACTLY that tradition Mom came up with when I was a kid. Instead of a self-standing cardboard tree, Mom had covered the attic door with a cardboard tree poster. Also, while Tina was giving out eight leaves to each family member, in order to fill out and post all on Thanksgiving, Mom gave each family member THIRTY leaves, and we were to write something new each day of November, and post them as we worked our way to Thanksgiving.

Full disclosure: when I was a kid I LOVED when Thanksgiving was early, because it meant fewer leaves to fill out, since we never seemed to remember to continue the leaves past Thanksgiving.

Anyway, the only other difference is that my mom titled her tree the "Giving Thanks" tree instead of the simplified "Gratitude Tree" that Bob's Burgers used. Regardless; same basic concept, and I LOVE that one of the writers clearly had this tradition as well.

The double-edged sword was that this episode reminded me that I hadn't done my Giving Thanks Tree this year; which had turned into a simple list of 30 things I am grateful for after I went to college and no longer had a physical cardboard tree to attack leaves to. On the one hand, I was happy that I was reminded of this tradition, since I don't recall missing a year since Mom started it with us, but on the other hand, I was stressed that I now had to rush to try to get all of my bits of gratitude done on time.

So, guess what I did during the Macy's parade instead of working on this post or OatS.

Over 2600-words later, I had my list. I went into great length as to why I was grateful for each bit, but again, that's over 2600 words long. So instead, here's just the things I'm grateful for; no explanation included, and probably not even needed. This is how they would appear on my leaves if I still had physical paper ones to fill out.
  1. My mom
  2. My hubby
  3. A stable roof over my head/having a home
  4. I don't have to worry where my next meal is coming from
  5. My job
  6. My ability to practice my passion for writing so frequently
  7. My readers
  8. ChibiSunnie
  9. Taurus Pixie
  10. I live in a relatively safe town
  11. I have filled my life with respectful males that have made me feel safe around them
  12. Tumblr
  13. My minimal-drama orbit on Tumblr; the people I follow are awesome
  14. Miraculous Ladybug
  15. I don't have to hide who I am; personality wise
  16. My sister is finally realizing her own self-worth and demanding that higher standard in potential S/Os
  17. My writing group; despite what I said above about my struggles with them, I still love them and they have helped me quite a bit in their own way.
  18. My weekly Anime Day to help me connect more with my friends
  19. My friendship with Cyhyr seemingly strengthening
  20. My new friendship with Pixie's boyfriend Jowy Avilon
  21. My new car
  22. My year-long struggle with my car insurance issues are potentially coming to a close
  23. Frozen 2 and Disney movies in general
  24. The tradition of my mom's extended family coming together every post-Thanksgiving Saturday for our own Thanksgiving gathering
  25. Zumba
  26. This tradition of coming up with 30 things I'm grateful for each November/Thanksgiving.
  27. OutsideXbox, Outside Xtra, and the Oxventure campaign videos
  28. Official YouTube uploads from late night talk shows such as The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, Daily Show with Trevor Noah, Late Night with Seth Meyers, and Last Week Tonight with John Oliver.
  29. People see me as a safe person to talk to and be around; that I'm a good ally
  30. That I could come up with 30 things to be grateful for, and can easily keep going if I wanted to
So, there's my list. Do you have one? I'd love a taste of it if you'd like to share. It's a great tradition, but boy did it eat up my morning as I took time to take stock of my blessings and figure out the ones I wanted to include this year.

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By the time I was done with that list I had to get ready for the day, head to Hubby's work to pick him up, and then spent the rest of the holiday with him.

Friday was spent getting ready, packing, and driving down to my mom's for the weekend. Then I was socializing with them, even though I knew I still needed to work on this post, and I did pack up my laptop. Oh well. Family is priority.

Saturday I probably could have cracked open the laptop in the morning to work on my blog post since we didn't need to head out for the Thanksgiving gathering until nearly 2pm. However, I've been so drained lately, so Hubby and I actually slept until like... 10am I think?! There goes the morning writing, but the sleep was well needed so, oh well.
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We spent the afternoon and evening with my extended family, and I wasn't going to be so rude as to bring my laptop with me to work on my writing while hanging out with people I only see about once a year. By the time we got back to my mom's it was about 10pm and I was ready to just crash.

Sunday I slept in a touch again, but woke up early enough to go with my mom and sister to church with them, as a sort of gift to my mom who always wants me to join them. We then had tickets to watch Frozen 2 right after church, so I wasn't going to get onto the road until about 4pm, nor would I have time to write before heading out. The Nor'easter started coming through the area by the time I got back from church, so despite my mom's concerns, I figured "I'm not going to get ahead of this storm anyway; might as well give the plow/salt trucks time to get the roads cleaned" and went to the movie after all.

Post movie - which I enjoyed, by the way - we again wondered if we should head out or stay another night. We wanted to be home for Hubby's birthday yesterday, needed to hit up the DMV yesterday, and weren't sure if the storm would ease up prior to this morning anyway. So I shrugged, again put my faith in the plow and salting trucks, and braved the storm.

Dumb idea.

The roads were terrible. The standard speed limits of 65mph (~105kph) were dropped to 45mph (~72kph), and even then, a lot of the second half of the trip I had to drive little more than 30mph (~48kph)! That changed a 4hr trip into a little more than a 7hr one, made even LONGER when I... well... I slid off the road a little more than an hour away from home!
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I'm fine. Hubby's fine. The car is fine. The left overs and luggage packed in the trunk were fine. It was just frustrating. I was doing soooooo good with the weather, but I had to shift to the barely-used left lane to give space for a car coming off the on-ramp to the highway. Clearly no one is using this lane because who the heck is trying to pass cars in that weather!? So it wasn't plowed. It wasn't salted. It was bad, but the cars are now keeping pace with me, so I couldn't get back over to the better-traveled right lane for the better part of a mile. The highway turned slightly, and it was enough for me to lose traction, and off we went. The hill wasn't that bad where we were; but the snow and ice pile-up was too much for me to go anywhere. Fast forward about thirty/forty minutes - and a call to the state troopers for help - and the tow truck got me back up on the road and on my way.

There's $130-some well spent.

Needed to give Hubby one last adventure before his birthday, I guess.

The treads in my tires were fairly clogged with snow and ice at that point though, hence having to go about 30mph on the highway to avoid slipping again. We got home at about 11:30pm. I emptied the car while Hubby tried to quickly shovel the foot of snow out of my way to the garage. I then got stuck trying to make a K-turn in the road since our apartment is past the driveway to the complex's parking lot. Hubby dug me out, and I got stuck again making a turn into the garage, and again Hubby had to dig me out.

By the time we both made it inside it was nearly midnight. It was an exhausting day.
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Listen to your parents when they tell you not to drive in poor weather, folks.

Yesterday was Hubby's birthday, plus, I figured it would be silly to work on last week's blog post the day before this week's was set to go up, so I waved the white flag. I'm now down two weeks worth of posts this year. Whoops.

The weather was still crappy, and we got snowed in, along with all of Hubby's friends, so sadly we didn't manage to get to the DMV after all, nor did Hubby get to really celebrate his birthday with anyone. I'm hoping to make up for that some time this week while we're on vacation.

I should have at least worked on this week's post last night so I could have this morning to sleep in and snuggle Hubby. Instead I still slept in and snuggled, but that's why this post is still late.

So, yeah. November kind of sucked. I was behind on nearly everything all that month. I had the second-worst NaNo despite it being My Jam when it came to the year's theme. Mental health wise, the month also sucked. I'm so glad that month is over.

Although... with that storm on Sunday, December didn't start off much better. I hope I can turn the month, and the remainder of the year, around.

OatS isn't done, which is what I was aiming for this past November, but I have to change gears because I signed up for the Miraculous Ladybug Secret Santa exchange within the fandom. I have the person I'm to gift something to, and I have until Christmas to write the a story using the preferences they listed. So that's my new focus for the month. We'll see how this goes, and if I'll have any left-over time to also write gifts for my friends. I'll keep you posted, of course.

It's the Holiday Season now, so we'll see how chaotic life will be this month. Wish me luck.

Also, it was kind of a sucky day for him, but I'd like to send my Hubby a Happy Birthday anyway.

Take care, everyone, and if you're dealing with poor weather as well, please stay safe. Catch you next week.

4 comments:

  1. OK... I cannot, for love or money (fact: I haven't thrown any money at it) get an update from your blog! *grr* Must figure something out. I'm thinking I'm going to have to completely unsubscribe and resubscribe, and maybe that will help?


    So yeah. We got hammered in that storm, too. 2 feet in 2 days for us. *sigh*

    *hmm* what else. Oh! I finally got a tumblr, and am now happily stalking you on that! So there's something!

    Anyway... I'm glad you had a great Thanksgiving. Happy Birthday to your hubby!

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  2. And of course I just realized I posted this without my no-longer-current FF name on it. So... It's Chubby Unicorn Mama. *sigh*

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    1. Well first, sorry that you're not getting updates. If I were more tech-savvy I'd try to figure it out on my end but... er... *shrug*

      Second, I did see you following me. :D Nice to officially know your name though. ;) Hope you got shoveled out alright.

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  3. Yeah... tech savvy is not my strong suit, so I gave up and subscribed with my work email address. Hopefully that'll come through.

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