Holiday Crunch Time

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A very merry Festival of Lights to all of my Jewish readers. I hope this time brings warmth, joy, and love while among family - both related and found.

Sadly, Bitmoji doesn't have icons for any winter holidays beyond Hanukkah, Christmas, and Kwanzaa. The best options I have are...

All 3 generated by Bitmoji

 So, instead, we'll go with the ones I found a couple of years ago, even though I don't have any artist credits....

I hope any and all who celebrated Solstice and/or Yule this year enjoyed their celebrations, and found warmth, comfort, and joy with their loved ones.

I still can't find a legit Happy/Merry/Blessed Saturnalia image on Google. They are all images of Ancient Roman statues or  snarky comments about Christmas really being Saturnalia. So... if you practice Saturnalia, I'm sorry for not having a personalized image for you, but I still sincerely hope yours went well. May you have rejoiced with beloved friends and family, and feel renewed for the upcoming year.

If there are any other holidays I've missed, please let me know in the comments section so that I can properly remember next year.

And for those who don't practice any religion, I hope you still had - or have - the opportunity to rejoice throughout the season, and have the time to reflect upon your friends, loved ones, your own self-care, and the blessings you've received this passing year. May the holidays go smoothly for you, and may your days be filled with warmth and happiness.

So, once again.

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So, to all of my readers, however the year, December, and this holiday season have treated you, I hope you enjoyed your celebrations, or will enjoy them, if they haven't happened yet, and that the last week of the year is kind to you.

Speaking of holidays, 'tis Christmas Eve, and guess who is, like, a week behind on everything....

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Hubby put up the Christmas tree, so there's that, and he just sorted the lights on it. It still needs to be trimmed though, so part of today will consist of me playing one of my favorite Christmas movies - The Nutcracker Prince - in the background as I FINALLY get around to fluffing and decorating the tree... just in time to take it down again in like two weeks...

...

It's going to be up until April again this year, isn't it?


Also, fear not, my absolute-favorite Christmas movie was already watched last week: The Muppet Christmas Carol.

I could also throw in Ernest Saves Christmas, A Christmas Story, It's a Wonderful Life, The Christmas Toy, A Muppet Family Christmas, and Santa Claus is Comin' to Town for my list of "must watch" Christmas movies since they're also staples, but they aren't as "essential." It just doesn't FEEL like Christmas for me without The Nutcracker Prince and The Muppet Christmas Carol. Now, of course there's other classics, but those are more "nice to watch if we have time" than "crucial to me feeling The Season." Ya know? Everyone has their own list, I'm sure.

Also, I never really worry about watching A Christmas Story any sooner than today anyway, since the channel TBS has a 24-hr airing of the movie from Christmas Eve into Christmas Day. One day the station will end this tradition, and I'll be left hanging without a copy to watch.... I do not believe today is that day though. So that's Future Me's problem.

Hubby and I still need to wrap gifts, but at least I got his done this morning. Which is why this blog post is late THIS week; I needed to make sure his gifts were wrapped while he was at work and out of the apartment.

Of course, I'm still ages behind on my cleaning, kind of moving things out to the edges of each room - as it were - so we could do things like put up the tree and wrap gifts in the meantime. So I'll probably want to dedicate some time to THAT.

Knives from the Scott Pilgrim comic books
by Bryan Lee O'Malley

And guess what else I need to focus on today?

If you said "That ML Secret Santa story?" you are correct! Here, have a star.

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Yup. This week zipped by without me touching it at all. Like the dedicated writer that I am....

Last Tuesday I raced around while trying to finish that stupid-late blog entry; trying to beat the snow before it got too bad outside. It ended up being bad enough that we had to cancel our Writing Group meeting. I figured "sure, this is a good time to work on the story" but I got so caught up in the chores I needed to finish, and Hubby wanted to watch something - I think that's when we watched The Muppet Christmas Carol - so... no writing.

Wednesday was work, followed by cleaning and frantic Christmas shopping still. Then Hubby got his birthday gift to himself in the mail: 13 Dead End Drive. It's a Milton Bradley game from the early 90s that he always wanted to play, but never got the chance as a child. Same for me. So when Hubby saw it got a re-print/re-release, he knew he had to get it. Since we were both "denied" the opportunity to play the game as children, I took a time-out from my busy evening to help Hubby assemble the board game - and spend about 20 minutes trying to find a crucial rubber band about the size of those used on braces - and then play a couple of rounds with him.

We ended up missing the first half of The Masked Singer finale because we were playing. Whoops. We then tuned in for the second half, and by the time the show was done it was 10pm. I then spent the rest of my evening going through the other gifts submitted to the ML Secret Santa Tumblr, with hopes that it would inspire me to find a proper frame for my story; or a new idea for a story I'd feel more excited about.

No dice, but I am now up to about a half-dozen plot bunnies to use for later projects.

Also, of COURSE I thought of a cute winter-themed story idea YESTERDAY. I doubt I have time to write it out before tomorrow, and I WANT to get this story to my giftee by Christmas itself. Buuuuuut, I'm not opposed to maybe putting up this winter-themed story after Christmas, since it would still be during winter.

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As I mentioned last week, Wolfhearted wasn't available to D&D this week, which turned out to be a bit of a blessing. Normally Tuesdays are Laundry Day, but with the weather so bad, we had to push it back. Wednesday wasn't much better with the snow and icy/slushy roads, so it got pushed back again. Thursday still had more snow, but the roads weren't as bad as the previous two days. Which in and of itself was a blessing, because Hubby and I were running out of clothes.

Have I ever mentioned how much I hate having to use a laundromat instead of being able to just do laundry whenever I wanted at home????

While I was out anyway, I did more last-minute Christmas shopping, and picked up dinner. By the time the clothes were dry and folded, it was closing in on 10pm again, and I was getting a bit exhausted. I didn't have the mental strength to try to create something, so I zoned out on Tumblr again; catching up on the ML Secret Santa uploads.

Friday I was DETERMINED to get the tree up, clean, and squirrel away to write.

I had forgotten that Hubby and I already had plans to visit The Nerds: Rozsavaria and her husband Sarpadian. I had work as well, so between that, dinner, our evening visit to watch Pokemon: Detective Pikachu, and then the three of them - Roz, Sar, and Hubby - playing Pokemon Sword and Shield, I didn't get home until 11pm. Certainly no time to write.

It was a good visit, though. Hubby and Sar rarely have schedules that match up to the point where they can hang out, so that was nice. Also, the movie was somehow about par with what I was expecting, better than I was expecting, and still in need of more polishing than I expected. It really just depended on what scene you were watching at any given time.

There were some quality inconsistencies is what I'm saying.

Saturday I had work, again, but Hubby finally had off. As I mentioned above, he cleaned up a lot of the dining room so he could put up the Christmas tree. Now, just to explain real quick, my "dining room" is actually just a random extra common room separated from the living room. We have a dining table in it, and so it is the "dining room" when really it's more of a multi-purpose room. Hence the tree being in it.

This was after Mom helped me and Hubby organize our place a couple of years ago.
I assure you it looks nowhere as clean now,
and that fact makes me cry, so let's ignore that....

Our Christmas tree is tucked behind the snack tables, on the other side of that wall the sofa table of games is butted up against.

Anyway, Saturday was still our standard Anime Day with Omnibladestrike and Hubby's one best man, whose online persona I actually don't know... so we're going to call him Goob. I don't recall if I ever gifted him a nickname here before, but Goob is a nickname we gave him IRL, so it works.

Hubby, Omni, and Goob were playing Pokemon Sword and Shield on their respective Switches when I got home, so I utilized that time to get more cleaning done. Part of me hoped they'd just Pokemon all night so I could squirrel away to write, but the boys really wanted to get to the anime. I didn't want to miss out on the advancing stories of the various animes we get in, so I stopped for dinner and anime... and kept going until Hubby passed out on the couch at about 11pm.

So... yeah... no writing again....

Sunday! Sunday I got out of work at 4pm! Clearly I had more than enough time to write then, right?

Especially since Hubby worked until 10pm, so I was alone in the house. That is six hours of cleaning and writing time. Riiiiight?

NuaNia
Facebook sticker
by PRANEAT

The afternoon started off alright. I got home in time to watch the NY Giants kind of stumble their way into overtime, and then win their game.

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(ignore that this is me and not
my LycoRogue persona...)

Then I did a large load of dishes, and cooked myself dinner. The night went kind of downhill from there. Dinner making did not go well; I'll spare you the details, it was a bunch of stupid stuff that piled up. Paying bills reminded me how little spare cash I had left for Christmas gifts I STILL had to get to finish our list off. Thinking about Christmas gifts reminded me that I haven't had time to finish up Hubby's Part II for his gift; the main reason I got him what I did. I also never had the time to make little stuffed animals for my niece and nephew like I wanted. I had forgotten to mail out Christmas gifts, so now everyone getting one mailed is going to have to wait until January for them.... sorry about that, guys.

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Since I was already in a downward spiral, the stress and time-crunch I was facing just imploded on me. The emotional, heart-string-pulling commercials that play around the holidays - such as the granddaughters making a memorial video for their grandfather, and the family having a flash mob create a yellow ribbon for military members coming home for Christmas - didn't help matters. There were also emotional stories about the football players that aired during half-time and in-between games. I don't remember any specific ones right now, but I'm fairly sure at least one was about a player talking about his mom and her sacrifices to help him achieve his goals. There's always at least one of those. I think there was also one about a player who - due to medical reasons - had to give up playing shortly into his NFL career, but is now a coach and how fulfilling that is.

At 8pm there was a re-airing of the finale of The Masked Singer, and since I missed that first hour on Wednesday, I watched that instead of cleaning or writing. Also a bad decision on a night where I was already in a poor mental-health spot. Watching the celebrities talk about how important the anonymity of The Mask Singer was for their self-confidence reminded me of my own Writing Funk(s), and that got me sobbing again.

Since I was mostly paying attention to the show, I figured that was the perfect time to try to mindlessly catch up on Tumblr... where I found even MORE emotional posts of one nature or another, and posts talking about giving creators love and appreciation, and posts talking about struggling with self-confidence in writing but how the littlest things really help, and fanart of fanfics because they are just "too amazing" and it inspired the artist who wanted to help promote it - usually these posts are followed up with people adding in how everyone should read said fanfic. I wondered if I would ever become that renown in the fandom; could that ever be me?

It... it wasn't a good night for me, is what I'm trying to say. I saw once that crying is like taking the lid off a boiling over pot: it won't solve anything - the pot will still be boiling over - but it will remove the added pressure so there's time to correct the problem before it gets worse.

So, on Sunday, I took off the lid, I guess.

I still need about a week to really be ready for a holiday that is essentially "here" already, and the "heat" is probably up too high, as it were, but at least I'm not boiling over anymore. Hopefully, within the next few days, I'll have time to get myself to a "proper temp."

Needless to say, no writing on Sunday.

Yesterday was my last day of work before these two days off, and then back to working straight through until my mom and sister visit. So that heat is actually probably going to go right back up again. Hubby's trying to be a better chef, and keep a more watchful eye of that burner for me.

Hey, Kettle, is this enough stove top analogies for a day?

Anyway, yesterday was work, followed by one MORE day of "last minute" shopping, and Hubby trying to both help unwind me as well as get me more into the Christmas Spirit by watching The Knight Before Christmas on Netflix.

It. Was. Cheesy. But... not in a bad way? Hubby and I joked "It's a Hallmark Channel Christmas movie, but with DIVERSITY!" There's even three different inter-racial couples spanning 4 races: Latina/Asian, Latina/White, and White/Black. So... cool.

The Knight Before Christmas was probably on par with Detective Pikachu: better than I was expecting, while simultaneously being about as cheesy as I was expecting, and having real head-slap moments that really should have been written/directed/acted/edited better.

After our wind-down and Christmas movie - and a bunch of Christmas goodies Hubby got from work - it was nearing 11pm again. I ended up staying awake until 1am chatting with friends online, checking in on the ML Secret Santa blog, and trying to clean a touch. But the mental wherewithal was not there for writing.

Yesterday was of course the day I thought of the winter-themed fanfic idea, and figured if I could finish my existing story - so I had something to gift, at least - then I could use today and tomorrow to try to get this new idea done.

Yup. That.... fell through hard.

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Now, normally this would be the time where I'd say "Fear not, for I had downtime at work that I used for writing!" but alas, I can't even say that. Most of the week was spent wrangling the endless price tags at work. We had to update all of the clearance items in the store, and... due to reasons I won't get into... it takes longer than it should up front so that life is easier for us on the back end. So that was pretty much three solid work days. Our Christmas sale ended yesterday as well, so that was two more days spent scanning the store, printing and folding tags, and putting them up, all while still helping customers and taking an hour-long lunch break for a mini office Christmas party yesterday. What little time outside of tag-updating I had was spent pushing through to finish Part II of Hubby's gift. It's not quite up to par with my standards - which, admittedly is more "perfectionist" level for my own crafting - but Hubby's more laid back, and tends to love anything I make him. He's good people like that. So I hope he's going to love what I did, and I can polish the rough edges later; when life isn't as chaotic.

So... yup.... no free time at work either, and the limited amount I did have earlier in the month were "wasted" on reading as much fanfic as possible... and slowly dipping into despair at how fantastic and lovely those stories are compared to what I wrote.

I'm so. So. So. Sorry, Secret Santa giftee. I swear I'm trying to put in the effort!


Clearly this all means I do NOT have a link to my story for you guys to all read. Next week, though. I do have until the 31st to complete my story. I want it up for my recipient before Christmas concludes; preferably some time today so they can "find it Christmas morning" as it were. But I DO have another week, should the need arise.

I'm hoping for a much more stable week and less "whiny" post next week. I'm also hoping the joy of Christmas finally strikes me when I'm with Hubby's side of the family tomorrow.

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And, to all African American readers I might have:

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Again, please tell me if I missed a holiday you, my dear reader, celebrate.

Until next week! May each and every one of you have a less-stressful closing week to 2019, may you find comfort and love among family and friends, and may you get to celebrate with your family - be them blood, adopted, married-in, found, or a happy combination of that list.

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