July is just zipping by, isn't it? It's hard to believe Independence Day already came and went, as did the first week of Camp NaNoWriMo.Okay, sorry to the folks that like to go completely fresh and unknowing into things, but virtually this whole post is going to have spoilers for nearly everything I talk about.**SPOILER WARNING**
You'll have a happy little section in the middle where I talk about my Camp NaNoWriMo progress, and some at the end where I promote a story I wrote already this month. Otherwise, there isn't much to read this week if you want to skip over these different spoilers. HOWEVER, if you just want to skip CERTAIN spoilers, I'll mark the beginning of each one with a header. Sorry, guys...
- Minor spoilers for the latest "Miraculous Ladybug" episode
- Minor spoilers about scenes I have written up for "One and the Same" as I try to figure out the best order for them.
- A major spoiler for the romantic subplots for the books "Graceling" and "Bitterblue" that I've been reading.
That's right! I was so busy playing catch-up last week, I didn't really have time to talk about my July Camp participation.
First and foremost, I am yet again attempting to work on "One and the Same." I'm hoping for a few things: 1) third time's the charm with regards to working on this story during a NaNo month, 2) I had stepped away from this story long enough to feel rejuvenated, 3) the success I've had writing over the summer in the past strikes again, 4) new Miraculous Ladybug episodes will help re-inspire me.
Minor Spoilers: ML episode
Contains no-context screen shots
I mean, the new episode this weekend didn't really help with the plot of my story, but how can my little shipper heart not swell when I see this soft smile from Adrien?
Side Note: This is the second time Nino has gone against Gabriel's rules in order to throw Adrien a surprise party; the first one was the premiere episode "The Bubbler."
Anyway, Nino was trying to have it be a "guys' day" party, which meant "no girls allowed," much to Adrien's dismay, who was wondering why Marinette wasn't at the party. The above smile was when it was revealed that Marinette had dressed in a costume in order to sneak into his party.
First, Adrien was just as surprised as everyone else:
Adrien's response was the above soft smile. Here, have it again because it is so cute.
So.... yeah. While it doesn't really help come up with parallel references for my plot, it still gives me shipper feels that helps make me want to just smoosh these two together. Kind of like The Gorilla with his action figures in this episode....
*Ahem*
So, yeah...
END OF EPISODE SPOILERS
Here's hoping I make some progress with "One and the Same". It's been really slow this first week, though, as I go back through old scenes to try to polish them up a touch and figure out how to thread them together. It's been... and interesting process.
Minor Spoilers: One and the Same
I have this one scene where Adrien is dressed all in black in order to help promote his father's new fashion line, and their teacher Miss Bustier randomly selects Marinette and Adrien to give each other affirmations to start their school day. Marinette gets flustered by Adrien's all-black look, and Adrien just smiles lovingly at her as he shows off some of his "Chat Noir side" by flirting oh-so-slightly.
I love this scene. I want to use this scene. I have no clue where I want to put this scene.
Originally, it was in the third chapter of the story! Right off the bat, Marinette showcases how flustered she is around Adrien, and right out of the gate Adrien is trying to get Marinette to fall for his Chat Noir side before revealing his feelings for her. This is mainly because Ladybug has rejected his goofy Chat Noir side countless times, so he's afraid he can't have a relationship with Marinette until he can get her to fall for that half of him.
I really liked that placement when I first wrote the scene.
But now it feels like it just bogs down a chapter that also seems a bit disconnected. The Morning Affirmations scene does relate to the main body of the chapter, which is Marinette wondering if Adrien has low self-esteem, and is therefore trying to emulate Chat Noir. However, the chapter is already so long, and it feels weird to have a long "start of the school day" scene and an even longer "end of the school day" scene, and then just sort of hand-wave over the school day itself.
Alternatively, I have another chapter about mid-story where Adrien "accidentally slept in" and so he came to school a bit disheveled: hair not QUITE in place, so a little bit of his Chat Noir shagginess is showcased, and his usual white cover shirt is replaced by the black cover shirt introduced in the above "all black" scene. Marinette is flustered, but manages to get a few solid sentences out as she uses Adrien's "off" look to envision him as Chat Noir; making him easier for her to talk to. Since so much of this chapter is about Marinette imagining Adrien as Chat Noir, that way she isn't as flustered around him, and it's almost exclusively the start of the school day, perhaps I combine this scene with the "all-black" one? Maybe Adrien is promoting the all-black look for his father's latest line, but he also over sleeps, so his hair's in a bit of disarray? Marinette and Adrien have their affirmations, but then Marinette convinces herself to picture Adrien as CN so she can talk to him?
I loose cute moments from both scenes if I combine them, but the overall story may run smoother. Except, now I'm missing a major catalyst from the 3rd chapter, because I still need Adrien to subtly act like Chat Noir while at school in order to get the reaction I need from Marinette, that way I can THEN get the counter-reaction I need from Adrien to jumpstart chapter 4... which is kind of the true inciting incident for the whole story...
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| Tanuki Facebook sticker by Yanare Ku |
Same with a sort of half-scene where Alya playfully yells at Adrien for a bad pun, sending him to the corner until he can "learn proper humor."
On the flip side, one of my later chapters had a part where Marinette learns that Chat Noir isn't just a flirt; he genuinely loves Ladybug. The chapter this realization originated in was a bit interrupted by this "ah-ha moment." And so it got moved to its own chapter, further back in the story. I have the back half of that chapter written. I just need to figure out how to get there.... I also need to figure out if I want to stop where I did, or if I want to wrap the chapter up some other way. I may have to wait until the chapters are laced together into one master manuscript before I decide that though.
Also, the original section I had cut is almost completely re-worked. Chat Noir was much more playfully whiny, and Marinette much more teasingly comforting my first go at the "Chat Noir Truly Loves Ladybug" micro-scene. I don't think I can really use any of it now, but it will stay in document limbo in case I want to use that alternate version in another story.
Or, much like my alternate Bracelet Scene, I may just post it to Tumblr as a nixed alternate scene. Who knows?
END OF OATS SPOILERS
I've also committed to my "flip the final chapter POV between both Marinette and Adrien" format. It's not professional, but screw it. Fanfiction doesn't need to be professional quality. It may upset a few of my readers to go from one POV per chapter to a bouncing POV - broken up with line breaks and POV switch headers - but I really can't figure out whose POV is more important for this final chapter. There's a LOT to take in and wrap up, and both parties have a LOT going on in their heads. It would be Adrien's turn, but after the last Marinette-POV chapter's ending, I can't NOT go into her head again.
Divvying up the chapter just seemed the most suitable solution. Although, now that I'm doing THAT, I want to make sure the switch doesn't happen every 3 paragraphs or so, which means taking more time with each character before switching, which means an even BIGGER chapter.
So maybe I break the chapter in half, and the final TWO chapters will be split POV? Or I could tell one side of the climax via Adrien's POV, then re-tell it in the next chapter via Marinette's POV, and then have a final chapter post-climax and have THAT be the joint POV chapter?
What do you guys think? Would you rather:
A. Read the scene playing out in real-time, but have the POV switch between characters, and have the "bouncing" POV for 2 or 3 straight chapters?
or
B. Read the scene about 70% of the way through with Adrien's POV, then rewind in the next chapter to re-read the same scene, but from Marinette's POV, and then conclude with one more chapter containing the final 30% of the scene either in the split-POV or in 3rd person?This would be so much easier if I just wrote the whole story in 3rd, but I fear Cyhyr's right, and it would be weird to have the sequel to a 1st-person POV story be a 3rd-person POV story.
Darn writing. Why does this need to be so hard!?
So.... yeah.... that's the progress I have with "One and the Same" as of right now. A jumbled mess of "Okay, let's fix this, and edit this, and start writing this, and move this to it's own limbo-document until I know where I want to go with it..."
It doesn't help that the first three days of July virtually saw NO writing as I pushed to get my reading of "Bitterblue" by Kristin Cashore done. A failed attempt, actually. I had neglected to bring the book out-of-state with me when I visited my mom. So, the day the book was due back at the library, I still had 70pgs left to read when I had to head out to my writing group meeting, which runs right up until the library closes. Had I brought the book with me, I would have read my 38pgs/day goal, and I would have had the book done on time.
Instead, I renewed the book for another 2 weeks, and proceeded to take less than 2hrs to finish reading everything, including the bonus content at the back of the book, as well as the acknowledgements. So glad I have this book until the 16th....
And, yes, I do still have the book. I'm flipping back through to scenes that really stuck out for me, and taking pictures of the passages so I have them as reference points.
Reference points for 2 reasons, actually:
1) Fandom reference. If I need to look up something for ML, I can just bring up episodes and re-watch the scenes I need. I can't do that with a book, especially one I don't own. With the picture references I won't have to flip back through a 500+ pg story to find the precise scene I need to refresh my memory for fanfiction or just general fandom knowledge. Also, I won't have to wait until I can check the book back out of the library - or, if/when I buy the book, wait until I find the book in my personal at-home library.
2) Writing reference. More importantly, with the photos of the passages I like, I have a quick-guide to wording I really like for various reasons. Perhaps I liked Cashore's turn-of-phrase, or how she described something world-building wise, or it evoked powerful emotions that I want to revisit and/or have as a guide for instruction on how to evoke emotions the same way. Just like with the fandom reference, having the photos means I don't have to have the physical book with me in order to re-read a specific scene, nor will I have to spend a great deal of time flipping through and re-reading unneeded passages in an effort to find the one I need.
Either way, it's a great way to study Cashore's writing as I keep going back to those scenes. A way for me to potentially improve my own writing.
I THINK I have the main passages I want - roughly 70 pages out of the 539pg story - and I can return the book in the next day or so. I just need to take the time to re-name the pictures by their page numbers so I can easily double-check that I have them all.
It will be a project, and another distraction from my Camp writing. Oh, glorious "Bitterblue" distractions from writing. First, I read instead of writing. Second, I re-read looking for passages I wanted to photograph. Third, I need to organize the photos before the book is due on the 16th. Finally, instead of working on my Camp project of OatS, I used all of my writing free-time on the 4th working on a "Bitterblue" one-shot. Something I'll talk about below.
But first, I want to see how far behind "Bitterblue" actually put me, and how much I've actually done with OatS.
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| A previously sold (read: old) word count tracker for Camp NaNoWriMo Designed by Miss Write You can find other amazing (and really cheap!) trackers, calendars, and planner stickers on her etsy: WriteMissWrite |
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| Hacker Girl Facebook sticker by Birdman, Inc. |
All-in-all, I should have been at 10,870 words by the end of the week. Instead I had 7004; 3866 words behind. Good start...
As for how far I am now? Only up to 7507 out of 13,044. By the end of the day I'm supposed to be up to 15,218! Camp... hasn't been going well yet again.
I'm writing though, and I have my story for July already done. Again, more on that in a little bit. I'm slowly getting back into the rhythm of the story again, and, as I noted above, I've re-written some chapters already. Finally, I'm meeting some really neat people in my cabin. At least half of the group is really talkative, and we all just chat about once a day. Although, I have been skipping the chat log so far this week so I can pretend I'm catching up on my writing. I'll have to check in at some point, but I know I'll have about 50 messages to read through before responding.
I also found some fellow Miraculers in the cabin. One in particular is working on a Miraculous Ladybug fanfic this month as well. An Enemy AU, "Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog" crossover fic. Their first multi-chapter project. I instantly remembered how it felt to work on “Peeping Tomcat”. I hope Becklemania enjoys the journey. I have their story queued up for post-Camp readings, but if you don't want to wait, you can read what they have up so far over on AO3: Chat Noir's Sing-Along Blog
That's my progress with Camp NaNo so far this month, but how about we back-track to that "Bitterblue" fanfic?
Major Spoilers: "Bitterblue" romantic subplot
(and also the "Graceling" romance subplot)
I was kind of devouring "Bitterblue" as quickly as I could without it being the only thing I did all day outside of working. Again, I'll have to write up a separate blog post just talking about my thoughts on "Graceling" and "Bitterblue" because there is a LOT. Obviously, because it inspired a fanfic.
Actually, it inspired more than just a simple fanfic.... nearly 90% of the way through the story - it's literally about 87%; I calculated it via page numbers - there is a hand-waved sex scene. Technically, "Bitterblue" is within a Young Adult book series, so sex can be implied, but it can't be described.
In "Graceling" the characters are in a make-out session, and then the one questions if they have seabane. In Cashore's world, seabane is an herb that prevents pregnancy if consumed within 24hrs after sex. So... an herbal Morning After Pill, as it were. Anyway, the characters are making out, there is a question of whether or not they have any seabane, the other comments about it being in with their medicines, then there is a line break signalling the end of that scene. The next scene starts with them cuddling and the one character asking the other why it is that only females bleed and hurt their first time. Obviously this is pointing out that at least the one character was a virgin, although it could probably be assumed the other was as well.
It's a sweet moment, but, as I'll discuss more in that Graceling Realms post in the near-future, the relationship build was kind of sprinted through to get to that point. So I don't know if them getting together finally was nearly as satisfying as it could be. On the flip side, it meant we had more story of them being a couple, and it's nice to actually SEE a couple in media, instead of the agonizing "will they; won't they" leading to a joint love confession at THE VERY END of the movie/book/series, and their relationship just left for the audience to imagine.
None of that's really the point. My point is that the same hand-waved, literary "fade to black" in "Bitterblue" left me wanting. The romantic tension was SOOOO much more intense in "Bitterblue", plus I felt like there was an honest to goodness love triangle situation. I would be equally happy if Queen Bitterblue ended up with either of two suitors hinted at throughout the book, and at the same time, I'd be equally heartbroken that she didn't end up with the other.
Then there was page 471:
That's the end of the page. So I flip it over to 472, expecting more, like it was in "Graceling." I was itching for more literary fore-play, as it were. Instead, I got this as I began reading page 472:She woke from a nightmare of falling. Ashen, herself, bones, everyone, everything falling. She woke crying out and thrashing and was astonished, then devastated, to find Saf there holding her, comforting her, for this time she was truly awake, and with Saf, all the other truths of the waking world rushed back. And so she clung to him to push them away, pressed herself against him. She felt the length of his body against hers; she felt his hands. She heard his whispers, let him fill her ears and her skin. She kissed him. When he responded to her kisses, she kissed him more.
"Are you certain you want this?" he whispered, when it became clear what was happening. "Are you certain that you're certain?"
"Yes," she whispered. "Are you?"
Like... what!? That was it!? "Are you?" and then "yup. They did the deed."? Tease! In truth, especially with the line "and a friend..." - considering the characters in "Graceling" instantly acknowledged they were lovers after - an innocent mind could POOOOOOOSSIBLY think the two just made out all night or something. The only real CONFIRMATION confirmation was on the NEXT page:* * * * *What it did was return her to herself. For Saf reminded her of trust, of her capacity for comfort, her willingness to be loved. So that afterwards, when the pain came rushing back again, fresh and relentless, she had the strength to bear it, and a friend to hold her while she sobbed.
This is even LESS subtly followed by Bitterblue dressing herself, and asking Saf to wait a moment before getting dressed, because it was too dark before and she had never seen a naked man. Once Bitterblue returns to her chambers, she takes some seabane, and laments the complicated situation surrounding the first time she'd have to consume the herb.It was early morning when her growling stomach woke her. She opened her eyes to light, and the strange comfort of the dream. Then, memory. Aches, all over, from [CONTENT REMOVED DUE TO FURTHER SPOILERS FOR THE BOOK, JUST KNOW IT WAS DEPRESSING STUFF], from crying, loss, from Saf.
So... yeah, it's pretty obvious what happened between pages 471 and 472, and it was eating away at me that we didn't get more. Again, I know that explicit content would have never made it into the book, but I still wanted MORE. I needed a greater pay-off for the Bitterblue/Saf romance subplot.
My only option was to write it myself.
I used cues from the rest of the chapter, things like Saf's comforting voice, his use of her alias Sparks, the fact that Saf held and comforted her in her grief, and the above line: "For Saf reminded her of trust, of her capacity for comfort, her willingness to be loved."
I also used this line from page 473:
Now that I had these main clues as to how everything went down to use as a foundation, I spent those precious writing moments over the holiday to write me some "Bitterblue" smut.How loyal and gentle Saf had been with her, and without her asking it of him. As quick to love as he was to anger, as quick to warmth as to foolishness, and he had a tenderness she wouldn't have expected from him.
Because apparently, if it's summer, it's the Season of Smut for LycoRogue...
END OF "GRACELING" AND "BITTERBLUE" SPOILERS.
To catch up anyone who skipped over the above spoilers... I wrote smutty fanfiction for the book "Bitterblue."
Now, to be completely fair, there are nearly 1700 words before I even START really getting into the sexual aspects of the story, and actual sex doesn't occur until after 2300 words - 4 pages - into the story. On top of all of that, the last 300+ words are post-sex after-care and snuggles.
So, really, at about 760 words and barely more than a page of content, the sex itself is a small fraction of the overall story.
The story is more fluff with a side-order of smut.
Which is probably why it's the first bit of smut I released out into the world.
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| Hacker Girl Facebook sticker by Birdman, Inc. |
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| Helga G. Pataki from "Hey, Arnold!" by Craig Bartlett |
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| Serena/Usagi from "Sailor Moon" by Naoko Takeuchi |
So, it's clearly a small fandom, especially since I never heard of the trilogy before, despite it coming out over 7yrs ago. The fandom has petered off it seems. I don't know if anyone would be looking for new "Bitterblue" fanfiction, let alone wanting to read smutty fanfiction.
So.... I'm "safe," right? It's cool to post this story because who's really going to ever read it... yeah?
Says the woman who is currently awkwardly trying to promote the darn thing...
Meh, the difference is that you guys aren't TOTAL strangers to me. I mean, sure, I might not know who a lot of you are, but you faithfully come back here, right? You enjoy my writing. I do know at least 10 of you, I'd imagine. It's not QUITE the same as having "strangers" find it.....
....
Why did I post this story again?????
Because I didn't just post it to AO3, where I can throw up a slew of tags and mark the story as explicit sexual content.
I knew I couldn't post it to FFN, and I probably wasn't going to get anywhere on DA with an "Adult Content" block on a story; something most don't go to DA for anyway.
But.... I DO have my Tumblr... and the mature/explicit content is "hidden" behind a "read more" link. And there's no pictures to get my story flagged... in theory....
So far so good, and there aren't any notes on the story, so I don't know if anyone even read the thing or if everyone just went "Oh... smut... moving on then." Perhaps I won't get flagged....
AAAAAAANYWAY. I DID have a few people read it on AO3 though.
Wolfhearted is my "I don't feel ashamed when I talk dirty around him" friend, my "he doesn't judge; nor should he" friend, my "okay, it's safe to send my smut to him" friend. He's already read "Rensin's Conquest" - my Jolene smut - and he absolutely loves "Some Like It Flame Broiled" - my Trish/Devon smut inspired by Ronoxym's own smutty AU story for these two. I'm actually still periodically going back to SLIFB in order to tweak and re-do so it's not so cringey, and Wolf reads each rewrite....
So, I sent him my "Bitterblue" smut. He agreed that it was more a cavity-inducing fluff story that just so happens to include sex. He had one critique, and, the more I think about it, the more I kind of agree with him, but I'm not going to bother to go back and tweak....
I then told one of my readers, back when I thought I was going to be too shy to share the story here on my blog, that I had the fic up. I don't think she has an AO3 account, so I knew she wouldn't get a notification.
That was it. Those were my two readers over the holiday. I was pleased with that. Especially when Wolf told me he enjoyed the story. I also got this unofficial review from the aforementioned reader:
So, uh... yeah. Neat. Two good reviews from people I "know" - in truth, I don't KNOW know the above reader, but she's a faithful one, so close enough? - and I was content with my work.OK!!! Now I have to go and read it!!!!
I'm back! That was awesome. I have to admit it has been way too long since I read the trilogy. (I read it when it first came out). Now I want to go back and reread it!!!!
Then, unexpectedly, last night I got an AO3 notification that I had a kudos and a review on my story!
Um....you don't understand how thirsty I am for [CONTENT REMOVED DUE TO SPOILERS] content ALWAYS and to have some tender and loving smut in the year 2019 is truly a blessing THANK YOU
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| Maki Natsuo from "Love Lab" created by Ruri Miyahara |
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| Marinette from "Miraculous Ladybug" created by Thomas Astruc |
However... since it IS - at least, for right now - my "one completed piece of fiction per month" for July... for any who are interested in this sort of thing... um... yeah... here's the link.
"Sparks for the Moment"
My story on AO3 is actually up to 8 hits as of this writing, so that means 5 other people read it!? Eeeeee
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| Grey from "Black Clover" created by Yūki Tabata |
I'm going to go hide in the corner for a few hours until I forget I also promoted my smut here on my blog, so I guess I'll catch you guys again either next week or later this week if I can get that Seven Kingdoms Trilogy/Graceling Realms blog post up...
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